All I have to say is that if people who have NOT YET SPONSORED ME even though they said they would SPONSOR ME had actually SPONSORED ME, then tomorrow I would be happily be below 14 stone and 7 pounds.
But if tomorrow I am below 14 stone and 7 pounds, then I will have officially reached what I gave been choosing to call my stretch goal. And so I will be allowed to eat a massive cheese sandwich.
I did not want this to happen. I wanted people who have NOT YET SPONSORED ME even though they said that they would SPONSOR ME to actually SPONSOR ME. I don't want people who have already sponsored me to sponsor me some more - those people have already been massively generous and lovely. And I thank them.
But in order to head off the massive cheese sandwich, and to give people more chance to sponsor me so that I reset my stretch goal to 14 stone, I allowed this to happen...
...so it is somebody else's fault that I will not be under 14 stone and 7 pounds.
Not, lest there be any doubt, the fault of the person who put all those chocolates in my mouth.