Finally, Channel 4 have realised that nobody is interested in watching a skinny person try ineffectually to gain less than a pound over 3 months. The new programme is to feature two enormous fatties in a competition to lose weight. And the cunning twist is that whichever of the two loses the most weight gets to win some money off the other person. In fact, I’m going to go out on a limb and guess that either the title of the show is, or was proposed to be, ‘Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is’.
Given that it is a competitive diet show, I’m hoping that we will witness fat people running 100 metre races against each other or attempting to do press-ups at each other. With any luck before the diet starts we will get to see some kind of eat-off between the two contestants. And maybe we’ll have some sneaky slipping of sugar and butter into meals – nice bit of calorie sabotage would add a bit of drama. All of this accompanied by a wobbly-headed doctor being all empathic and a skinny nutritionist giving them diet sheets featuring large quantities of fruit and veg.
If I can avoid it, I probably won’t be watching, though there is nothing like a wobble-headed doctor to put me off my food, and thereby helpful when you’re on a diet. I am curious as to whether the programme will actually guide the competitors in their choice of diet, or if they will just unleash them on the world and say, ‘Lose weight by whatever means you see fit! Including not just seeing fit, but getting fit.’
Googling has revealed to me that this programme was originally going to be called ‘Fatonomics’. Surprisingly, given what a terrible name this, they chose not to go with it. Seriously, ‘Fatonomics’? And they didn’t have to option to use ‘Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is’ because the BBC have already nabbed that title.
So they went for, and I know you will be excited to know what kind of idiotic title they went for, and I can assure you that it isn’t as good as ‘SuperSize vs SuperSize’, or even ‘Fatonomics’.
‘Weighing Up the Enemy’