We went to Jimmy's Farm today. You know, Jimmy, off of the telly. You know, friend of Jamie Oliver but that definitely isn't how he got on the telly. He's an expert on something or other. And he has a farm. Hence, Jimmy's Farm.
There was a pond.
And some animals, amongst them turkeys and chickens..
After we'd exhausted the possibilities of the many animals we sat down for lunch. The designated picnic areas had absolutely no shade so we went into the woodland walk and den building area. We sat on a log...
That would be Kayleigh, her gran and her great gran. It was a bit of a trek up a hill to get to this point and once we'd finished Denise said they would go back down the way we came in. I, foolishly wanted to see a bit more of the woodlands. So we went our separate ways. I said that I would meet them in about 5 minutes. I walked deeper into the woods...
Down a hill, guessing that this would lead me out.
Up a hill, round a corner, over a branch that had fallen across the path. Down a hill along the path that was getting narrower, up a bit, over a fallen tree that had probably fallen last winter. The path was getting fainter and I had the distinct impression that not many people came this way anymore.
There's a great book called Mythago Wood, about hidden pathways into ancient woodlands where archetypal figures from British myth continue to exist in primitive forms. Robin Hood and Herne the Hunter and Guinevere and Arthur running through sun dappled glades.
Nice bit of sun dappled glade there!
But then the path tailed away to nothing. Or rather, not nothing, but a boggy swamp with black, brackish water squelching around my shoes and whichever way I turned I was scratched by branches, bitten by insects, stepping into ankle deep mud. This was no primal woodland, this was blooming Blair Witch!
'Aaaagh!' I shouted. And then clawed my way via the shortest route back up to the path.
As I stumbled back into the sunlight, blinking, I clutched the arm of a passerby.
'What year is this?' I babbled.
'You are such an idiot,' Denise said. And then we bought ourselves a cream tea.