'It's no good,' said I to myself this morning, quite early because the sun was up at 5.30 and the birds were singing, 'this mortgage malarkey needs sorting out.'
So I upped and made a cuppa and had a shower and hairwash and fluffed up my hair, and BOUNCED some bread into the toaster which BOUNCED back out at me as toast, and I BOUNCED out of the door at 8 a.m to get the weekend shopping whilst Andy went to work. And I BOUNCED back, unloaded the shopping, and BOUNCED back into town and into Barclays, who had just opened their doors.
'I need to get our mortgage sorted out!' I bounced, all chipper smiles and boinging ponytail. 'I need to see Jason! He is our mortgage chap. We are moving house!'
'Right!' bounced the customer adviser lady, for bouncing is yea verily catching, and she bounced off to find Jason and he bounced back with her and we bounced back down to his office. We had a bouncy conversation - I was more bouncy than he, but then he is a relative youngster and therefore not as resilient to bouncing as us older bouncy ladies. (Toddlers are bouncy. Older ladies are bouncy. Tiggers are bouncy. Everyone else is flat by comparison.)
And after a VERY positive (and bouncy) conversation, and an appointment made for Tuesday to discuss porting and the such-like, I took my bouncy leave and bounced to the Nationwide. Well, I've got an ISA with them. That must show I'm fiscally prudent surely? Must be worth a shot anyway.
The bouncing stopped because there was a queue out the door. But I did do tiny bouncettes on my toes whilst I was queueing because of the positive visit to Barclays. I was on BOUNCING fire!!
Eventually, a nice chap asked how he could help.
'I need to see someone about a mortgage,' said I, back in full BOUNCING mode.
And he and I bounced to his cubicle and had a bouncy conversation during which I did a lot of positive body language stuff and a lot of smiley stuff and he took lots of details and HE was even more positive than Barclays about us getting a small mortgage to go with our massive deposit (for he did bug his eyes at our massive deposit.) And he was VERY positive. He also was very keen that me and his Lordship Malarkey moved our joint account to them - it would 'help' the mortgage process (apparently); but I am afraid the bouncing was affecting my hearing so that little bit of salespitch slipped in one ear and out the other.
Anyway, another appointment booked for Thursday. And I BOUNCED back to the car even more bouncily than on my outward journey because it seems that our buying-a-house condition isn't as dire as we were lead to believe by our randomly selected mortgage broker. (She was probably not very good at bouncing.)
I'd like to think that the massive forward progress achieved this morning was down purely to my decision to be a Saturday Bouncer, but I suspect it would have progressed regardless.
I have dared to sneak another peek at the brochure of our original barn. It might well have bounced back on track. It just might.