So that would leave...
'No way,' said he. 'I am going camping!'
I blame this rashness on the rooting about in the loft we have been doing in our major decluttering exercise pre-house move. Up in the loft is camping equipment - big tent, small tent, camp bed, rucksack, primus stove, two ring and grill stove combo - you get my drift. All was tested, and on Monday some made it into the car ready for the trip.
'I've booked a site,' said Andy. '£5 a night!'
Classy, I thought.
'Don't worry,' said Andy, almost as if he was reading my thoughts. 'It's got a shower block. And grass.'
'That's okay then,' I said. I tried to avoid rolling my eyes. And off went Andy like a 10 year old cub scout heading towards the jamboree of the year.
Various texts have come my way since. One of them mentioned a bear; in jest or not I do not know nor do I care to ponder upon. There have also been various photos which I shall share with you, dear Malarkey guests, in order that you may bear the angst with me. Here we go...
So there you go. One goes camping. (Sighs from a weary wife....)